Well, I just read this first chapter. I think it's good. I even understand the text. (I'm from Slovakia.) It was funny- i loved those parts. And this chapter was pretty long- that's a big plus!
I didn't like that the story was... how should I say it... too fast. Bonnie came there, suddenly she kissed Daniel. It was a very quick action. You should describe more! But, I like it at all. So, I am going to read another chapters. :)